Thursday, December 03, 2009

Random Dinner and Loneliness

This contains no recipes - well, maybe I'll put what I had for dinner tonight.
OK - here's dinner: 1/2 cup vanilla yogurt, 3 tsp pom arils, 4 pecans - all mixed together; plate of baby spinach with ketchup as my dressing; 1/2 kroger breadkfast muesli bread with honey peanut butter. Yes, I don't always cook gourmet things.
I come to a dividing line. I'm trying to think through this - so if any of you care to respond, I welcome the conversation.
Dinner is meant to be shared. Lunch - give or take (most of us work) - we can eat in the rush of everything. But, I long for the day that I have people to eat dinner with. Yes, the loud crunching (remind me not to make anything that makes noise), the slurping of soup (remind me not to make soup), or the complaining of "I don't like ________" (reminder: you can't please everyone all the time, as my Dad used to say). Dinner...I actually enjoyed Thanksgiving meal because we all sat around the table, people enjoyed what I cooked, people were talking, there was conversation. Not so much in my apt. Some days it is very nice to come home to the quiet. Some days - like today - I wish I cooked a nice healthy meal and actually sat down to the table (instead of the chair in my living room), carried on a conversation about "how was your day, honey" or "what did you learn in school".
Dinner and loneliness. I've read many articles through the years that even if you live by yourself, you need to fix a meal, sit down at the table with the table set. I sometimes do that - most of the time I don't. "Maple Street Memories" by the Statler Brothers is my conversation piece tonight (and one of my favorite songs, I rememember singing it in the car when I was younger).
I can see how the elderly lose their appetite - they don't want to eat by themselves. I wish I had that problem - I eat. But, sometimes it is just more interesting when you eat with others.
I like discussing the food with others, I like having a warm body in the house along with me.
And I pair this with the fact that I love living by myself.
Anyway, just thought I would share.
"She's got a hundred dollar wallet made of caribou" - quoatable words by David Wilcox as I listen to "Daddy's Money", staring at my empty black and red bowls, knowing that I have to do Bob's Biggest Loser Boot Camp video before going to small group tonight - in the cold.


Brian said...

I fully empathize with this article. I have gotten into the habit of only really cooking once or twice a week and eating left-overs the rest of the time.

It lacks variety, but without someone to talk to, it is difficult to justify the effort of a "real" meal.


Brandi said...

Awwwww...I love eating with you! I also love discussing food too. :) If it is God's plan, one of these days you will have that special someone to share a meal with, and little blessings to ask how their day at school went. I know the quiet gets lonely, but cherish this time and reflect on it. Love you!

In Definition said...

thanks for this post, kim. i remember nights in africa thinking the same kind of thing.

you just call us up anytime:) you know i always love a way to get out of cooking! haha.

Anonymous said...

I'm sorry you were feeling lonely last night. I think sometimes I take for granted having someone there and most nights we don't even eat dinner at our table anymore. Thanks for making me realize that I need to appreciate that more.

Can't wait to see you soon!

kd said...

I wrote this in response to the food blog:

Anti-age&skin-care said...

I agree with most of what you’re saying. I just posted something
about loneliness on my blog.

My blog is aimed mainly at senior citizens but I suppose it is relevant to most people...

Here is a part of what I have written.
The negatives of loneliness in senior citizens are well known. Excessive loneliness can easily lead to a sense of isolation, desperation and depression. This can result in substance abuse or worse if the senior citizen doesn't find a way to fight back against that feeling of being alone.

Read the rest of the blog at...